Happiness is…
Just what is happiness, anyway?
That’s the question I ask myself all the time, usually in those times when I realize, “Things are good; I should be calm and content and happy right now.” But then when I realize that I should be happy, I begin to realize that I’m not really happy for some reason. And usually, it’s one of two reasons. Most often, I start thinking of other times when I’ve been happy, and comparing them to this moment – and finding that this moment falls far short of the happiness I thought I experienced another time. I say “I thought” because somehow, happiness always seems better in hindsight than it does in the moment, so that those moments I cherish as my happiest are the ones that really didn’t feel all that happy at the time.
The other thing that ruins what should normally be a good and happy moment, is my realization that this happiness will soon end and I’ll go back to the normal non-happiness in just a little while… like it’s a sudden wave of nausea that will be gone if I sit still long enough. That seems to dull the happiness of any moment.
But why do I do this, and am I the only one? Why do we spend so much of our time and energy chasing after things that we think will make us happy, only to get to our goal and have the joy sucked out of it by our own inner thoughts? Don’t I, deep in my subconscious as well as my conscious, want to be happy?
Sometimes, I wonder.
Personally, I have always separated happiness and joy. I, too, have found happiness to be fleeting at its best. But joy finds peace and comfort despite the circumstances of life. It is not dependent on the goings on in our often-chaotic lives. Just a thought.
http://waitingtolive.wordpress.com